International Outreach

I’d like to give a shout-out to my  International Recruitment Liaison and Publicist, Grandmommy.  As you can see here, Grandmommy successfully infiltrated a National television program, the Today Show, with the explicit plan to recruit and advertise the importance of me.  I’d like to graciously acknowledge her excellent work both in choice of supreme strategic placement, as well as in her artistic handiwork and foresight with creating a sign to acknowledge me as the future Totalitarian Ruler of the Future.   Great work, Special Agent Grandmom.

Monster Hunter

As some of you may know, my aunt Emmie is one of the great Masters of capturing monsters. Under her tutelage, I have been sharpening my skills in stalking, trapping, and taming the wild beasts. I encourage all of you baby soldiers out there to do the same. You never know when having a monster in your corner could come in handy. Furthermore, hunting monsters is an excellent method of maintaining a constant state of awareness in the presence of Adults. We should all remember our mission here: to disarm the multitude of PTDs (Parental Torture Devices, such as the Slide and Carousel) and prepare for World Domination.

God speed.

Technology Babe

It has been some time now that we soldiers have discussed over sippy cups of milk the frustration of keeping in touch with such a wide audience. Yes, the Baby Army blog is an excellent forum for announcements and recruitment, but when we need to gather information, gather documentation, or simply gather together, our days of communicating via tin cups and string are no longer.

We are the children of the Technology Revolution, and it is time we take it up a notch. I hereby demand that Apple Computers donate one iPhone to each baby solider of the EmmaClaire Army. Baby soldiers! Rise up! Write to your Senators! The adults shall keep us in the dark no longer.

And while you’re at it, be sure to sign up on gmail as they have that fabulous chat option…

playdate or covert ops meeting?

I had an excellent brainstorming session with the potential General of the Baby Air Force this weekend.  It was truly refreshing to spend an afternoon with Lane, breaking down the infrastructure of the Greater Metropolitan DC area. She brought great insight into both the underground tunnels beneath the Capitol Building, and an extensive knowledge of all US air regulations.  Though, I must admit, the way Lane confessed her darkest secrets to Elmo, whenever she thought no one was looking, was a bit disconcerting.

where have all the leaves gone?

Here we are, steeped in the middle of winter. The sweetness of spring is gone, the summer sun has left us, the large pile of leaves Dad spent all day gathering up only to have me jump in the middle and drag it all around the garden has long since been composted…..winter is a dull time in the District.  I am ready for a good snowfall, a long day of sledding, or another day at the ice rink with Grandmom.  For now, dear Soldiers, here is a photo from happier times.  It will be Halloween again before you know it.  Until then, draw a few pumpkins, and send in some more suggestions for Total World Domination.

we shall prevail

Baby Soldiers, you will not believe the good news!  A few months back, I informed you all of our inability to fly.  You mourned, you cried, you begged to know why.  I could not answer.

Until now.

This weekend, I discovered the Instrument of Destruction we have all be searching for… the bicycle. Oh yes, my Soldiers of Doom, this is our new means of transport. Now we can gather en masse, undetected, and without the aid of our Wardens!

According to Wikipedia: The bicycle, bike, or cycle, is a pedal-driven, human-powered vehicle with two wheels attached to a frame, one behind the other. Invented in Europe in the 19th century, the bicycle has become the world’s most popular vehicle with about 1.4 billion in use.

Let us all marvel at the Baby Soldiers that came before us to create us such a beautiful piece of equipment. Now get on your bikes and meet at the Bunny Who Reflects Light at dusk.

private eyes are watching YOU

It is with great pleasure that I announce my newest recruits to the Baby Army: the Diabolical Twins.   Nick and Lucy will be my new Head Private Investigators/Canadian Recruitment Officers.   Let us welcome the Twins!  May their investigations prove seedy yet instructive, and their Canadian recruitment be bountiful.   I have long been on the search for a pair of chameleons who can infiltrate the deepest of sects of government, and if I dare to dream, may this new cross-cultural partnership truly make ours a small world.

The First Applicant - Lane Evelyn

 

It is an honor and a privilege to present you, HRH Emma Claire, my application for General of the Baby Air Force.

 

Besides my obvious skills at disguise and infiltration of even the most dangerous situations, I am excellent at rounding up and guiding your Baby Soliders to become the greatest pilots this country has ever seen.

 

Furthermore, with my proven skills as the Baby Army Weapons Expert, I feel I can truly fulfill the position of General in the Baby Air Force with ease and strength.

 

As I stand on the precipice of my fifth month, I can safely say that you should choose me, Lane “Weapons Expert” Evelyn, to lead the Baby Air Force. I will not let you down.

 

In other news, I have recently discovered that if you drink the water from your bath tub, it tastes delicious.

 

all photos stolen from: www.babymakesthree.wordpress.com

 

 

from great tradegy, an idea is born

It has recently come to my attention that we Baby Soldiers are fundamentally flawed. Over the past two years we have learned to stand, walk, talk, run, and fight the forces of Parental Domination. We have mastered the many branches of martial arts, weaponry, and warfare. But one skill continued to elude us: the power of flight.

I was certain that sometime around month 19 or 20, I would start to sprout my toddler wings, and commence my flying lessons. After all, Poppy and Mamo only just flew to Holland to spend the next few years living among the Dutch, why shouldn’t I follow suit?

Sit down, Baby Soldiers.

Our parents have once again deceived us. The power of flight is not inherent to humans. Rather we use a flying machine conceived by the Wright Brothers circa 1903.

Happening up Orville and Wilbur’s notes last Tuesday, I decided to rectify the situation.

Effective immediately, I am opening a new branch of the Baby Army:

The Baby Air Force.

After a few intensive Top Secret sessions with Uncle Bob, I have uncovered enough trade secrets of the US Air Force to start work on my very own.

Please send all applications and related correspondence to the Bunny Who Reflects Light. I will check for messages nightly.

The Greatest Week Ever

What a week this has been! On June 1st, I was able to welcome my new best friend and Mid-West Outreach Director, Evelyn Grace, to the EmmaSquad. Now only four days later, I get to welcome my other BFF/Weapons Expert, Lane Evelyn - born within the last hour!

I would like to give a shout out to my new homies who both thoughtfully chose the lovely name of Evelyn. This ensures fame and fortune for our future girl band, E Cubed. I call the drums. Aunt Emmie promised she would get me a drum kit at her earliest convenience. I am certain this will give endless hours of musical pleasure to my parents (or perhaps encourage them to build my sweet backyard cottage/Baby Army Operation Headquarters to practice in).

Welcome little Lanie! I look forward to long afternoons picking your brain on the best weapons of choice for the Baby Army while we sample the most delectable mud pits in the DC Metro area.

In other news, this is a good study on determination for the Baby Army: http://www.ifilm.com/video/2862195